Do yourself a favor…the next time you start to say something bad about yourself, SHUT UP! Seriously, shut up. Don’t say it.
You can think it, but don’t say it. Don’t mumble it under your breathe. Don’t say it to someone else. Don’t write it down.
Your negative thoughts don’t have to become reality. In fact they can’t be, because you are too valuable to the rest of us to live that way.
So shut up.
What do you do if your biggest critics are the people closest to you?
That’s the question a reader emailed me recently in response to my post, This 1 Thing Will Silence Your Critics Forever. In it, I suggest the best thing to do with critics is to leave them.
In her case, her biggest critics are her mom and her brother. So what should she do?
Before I answer the question, let me repeat my definition of what a critic is and isn’t, just so we are clear:
A critic is not someone who brings up legitimate concerns or occasionally points out flaws in your logic. A critic is not someone who tells a 300-pound man who hasn’t exercised since the Clinton administration that he should lose some weight and get on a training plan before running a marathon. There is a big difference between a realistic friend and a critic.
A critic is someone who tells you that any dream beyond his or her bubble of understanding is ridiculous or impossible. They label you a dreamer or a child. They believe it is impossible to live a dream and still provide for your family. They think that happiness on the job and responsibility are mutually exclusive. When you leave a critic’s presence, your energy is depleted, your joy stripped, and your dreams crushed.