Let’s get this right out of the way: The amazing, crucial, and top secret key to building relationships with the VIPs and influencers in the world is this…you introduce yourself. Blog post over. Wisdom dropped. Lives changed. Commence with the rest of your day.

How to build relationships with VIPs and influencers

But seriously, that is the key. It’s the hurdle most people aren’t willing to jump over. They aren’t willing to stick their neck out, risk rejection or possible embarrassment (which is rarely the result) and try to connect with someone who could change their lives.

My own struggle

I struggled with those fears for years. Even today, when I am about to hit send on an email or pick up the phone to call someone I admire, I am like a 13-year old boy calling a girl to ask her on his first date.

  • What’s he going to think?
  • Do I sound too pushy?
  • He probably won’t even read it.
  • I feel like such a dork.
  • I shouldn’t even bother.

I’ve dined with CEOs, played golf with the Majority Leader of the US House, hung out with Grammy-winning rock stars, and yet…only weeks ago, I stood at my desk with my mouse hovering over the send button saying those stupid things to myself.

The seconds ticked by and still…no email sent. It was a simple email. Just a quick hello.

Tick, tock, tick, tock. I went to get a drink of water. No email sent.

I checked Twitter. No email sent.

I paced around the office. I still hadn’t sent the email.

I checked the mail. I cooked lunch. I whittled a chair from a block of wood (OK, I made that one up). I did anything to avoid sending that email.

Until…I finally just pressed the send button.

Today, that person is a client.

A single relationship that could change my life. A single email that could literally alter the course of my business and my future.

Dinner with the CEO

Keith Ferrazi overcame the fears he had about connecting with VIPs and influencers. This ultimately helped him land a job as the Chief Marketing Officer at Deloitte.

As a 24-year old recent graduate of Harvard Business School, he asked the CEO of Deloitte to dinner. In fact, he made it a condition of his coming to work for Deloitte.

The nerve! A 24-year old barely out of grad school making that kind of condition? 24-year olds don’t get to be choosy. But Keith made the request any way. And the CEO said yes!

After dinner, Keith agreed to accept the job with Deloitte. But he had one more condition: That every year he and the CEO would eat dinner at the same restaurant.

He asked a question that no one else would dare to ask. Of the tens of thousands of applicants prior to Keith, no one asked to dine with the CEO. And he asked to do it every year.

The CEO said yes again!

Out of the thousands of people Deloitte hired that year, how many had direct access to the CEO? One. Keith.

Who was promoted the fastest? Keith was. Not the most skilled person. Not the hardest worker. Not the smartest or the best looking. Only Keith.

Is it fair?

You can say things like:

  • It’s not fair.
  • I’m more qualified. I deserved that promotion.
  • He got special treatment.
  • Well, if I knew the CEO, I’d get promoted, too.

Perhaps all of those are true.

You are only one relationship away from a breakthrough.

Life isn’t fair. It’s one big good ol’ boys club. Who you know and how well you know them is what separates the successful and the unsuccessful. It’s the difference in poverty and abundance. You either join the club or the club will eat you alive.

You may be more qualified, but it doesn’t matter if you don’t know the right people. The right skills without the right contacts are useless. The right ideas with the right connections to put those ideas into actions are of no use.

Don’t whine. Learn how to develop the right relationships that can help you change your life and finally achieve the breakthrough you’ve been looking for.


Right now, you are one relationship away from a breakthrough.

One relationship away from finally achieving your dreams. One relationship away from turning that crazy idea into a business. One relationship away from unthinkable opportunity.

The question is: Will you dare to reach out to enough people to find that one breakthrough relationship?

They Don’t Teach This in Schools

They don’t teach this stuff in schools, so you have to invest in yourself to learn this stuff. Learn how to network better, how to build better relationships, and how to leverage those relationships for mutual success.

Today is the last day to register for the Networking with Purpose LIVE event. Registration closes tonight (February 9) at midnight PT. We’re holding it tomorrow at 3:00pm ET, but even if you can’t make it live, if you sign-up today, you’ll have access to the replay for 30 days. Select the VIP option, which is only a fraction more, and you’ll also be able to join one of our bonus small group coaching calls. We purposely scheduled these at various times 2-4 weeks after that event so that you’ll have time to put what you’ve learned into practice and come to the coaching calls ready with your specific questions.

You could be one event away from a breakthrough. Sign-up today before registration closes.


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2 thoughts on “The #1 Secret to Building Relationships with VIPs and Influencers

  1. Rick Siderfin says:

    Fascinating story, Matt.

    Perhaps now would be a good time to mention something else I learnt from you, which is that a handwritten note will often get right through to a VIP where electronic messages don’t.

    Another tactic – find a charity that the VIP you are trying to get into contact with is active in support of. Then, if it is a charity you feel good about supporting yourself, throw yourself into some fundraising for it, and find ways to make sure your target VIP gets to hear about it. Charity works on an entirely different level in most people’s minds to business.

    Again, it might seem a bit sneaky, a bit underhand even, but hey – it works, and everyone benefits..

    1. Matt McWilliams says:

      So true…both work VERY well.

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